Career Path > Resume & Interview

Resume Advice

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Dstealth:

--- Quote from: Broadzilla on May 24, 2012, 05:05 ---What does this mean?

"•   Took charge of the division’s training program, transforming the command’s vision into a vibrant program.  Ensured that the divisional training plan benefited everyone in a 21-man division, regardless of experience level."

Too general. What does vibrant mean. Exactly how did the training transform into performance?

--- End quote ---

My Chief wrote that statement on an evaluation after I started to give training in the department.  How I understood it is that my training benefited everyone regardless of of their experience.  It was a vibrant program because it was alive and existed more than just in the class room setting.  We trained on every inch of that Engine Room and its operations.  

It transformed into performance by increasing the qualification and operation knowledge of the mechanics on the boat.  We also had competitions to create the best power point presentation.

I always thought it sounded awesome how he wrote that on the evaluation.  However; I can understand how an outsider who wasn't there might not be able to envision a machinery division being excited over training.

Training is just what I do.  I either strive for more knowledge for myself or try and give it to others.  I can remove that line if you suggest and put something else there...  I'll post my other resume below that I was using before this one.

PS> I don't mind harsh criticism.  In the end I just want to get back into nuclear power.

drayer54:
Get someone who knows nothing military to read this and identify your jargon. What's it mean to qualify subs? Honor man?

Also, it's a grammatical mess. Random capitalization, missing commas, etc...

Resume's need to be 100% factual. I'm not saying you didn't prove your ability on a ton of valves and save an Obama-term of money, but you should make sure this is something you can defend and not just feed out navy eval lingo.

You made a vibrant program? Just tell me what you did and if you were rewarded for it, I nor anyone else care about how awesome your self assessment is.

If this is draft 1, then it's a start. If you have been submitting this, then STOP and get it reviewed by some other people first. Please.

Also, google some other resumes and look at different formats and steer this boat away from the Navy eval that it looks like I am reading.


good luck!

Dstealth:
Here is what my resume looked like before I talked to the headhunter...  As for the $400,000 I obtained a Lean Zelot award for it.  With a letter from the admiral and such.  Anyways, maybe this resume is a better basis to start with. 

I am a Technical Management graduate with 9 years of supervisory experience.  As a former Navy Nuclear Engineer I helped install and test a new construction Nuclear Reactor on the USS Jimmy Carter.  I am an energized, positive, and committed to being a key player.  I work well in groups to achieve results; leading to documented results of $400,000 dollars in cost and production time.

Education:

1.   Bachelors of Science in Technical Management – 4.0 GPA at Devry University– Online – June 2012
2.   QAI – Submarine Force Quality Assurance Inspector – Groton, CT - Graduated July 2003
3.   Leadership – First Line Leadership Development Program – Groton, CT - Graduated Dec 2003
4.   Nuclear Engineer – Nuclear Power Prototype Training  – Ballston Spa, NY - Graduated June 2001

Supervisory Skills        Customer Service Skills      Teaching Skills      Troubleshooting Skills
1.   Lean Ideas           1.Multitasking                 1.Coaching              1.Analysis data
2.   Organization         2.Communication             2.Team Player          2.Attention to detail
3.   Persuading           3.Negotiating                  3.Open Minded         3.Quality Assurance

Feb 2009 to Present - Lead Operator – North American Pipe Co., Yucca, AZ

•   Supervise daily operation of equipment and production operators on multiple lines
•   Anticipate production outcomes to ensure the best quality and efficiency of the product.
•   Train and evaluate incumbents to improve job performance
•   Participate and analysis Six-Sigma/Lean process improvement projects

Feb 2008 to Feb 2009 - Various Jobs in Customer Service – Houston, TX

•   First Option Mortgage – Loan officer => Customer service, Sales, Computer skills
•   Papa Johns – Driver => Customer service, Sales
•   K-Mart – Electronics Department Salesman => Customer Service, Sales, Computer skills

Jan 2006 to Feb 2008 - Shop Supervisor – US Navy, San Diego, CA

•   Supervised and zero rework on all overhaul and repair.
•   Scheduled yearly calendar for repairs and overhauls
•   Performed quality daily inspections in shop and in ships
•   Reduced shop waste and increased production with Lean manufacturing techniques. 

July 2001 – Jan, 2006 – MM1(SS) nuke - US Navy, Groton, CT

•   Supervised and performed mechanical operations and maintenance in the Engine Room
•   Supervised and performed maintenance with Nuclear Quality Assurance work packages
•   Operated and performed maintenance on the Primary and secondary engine room which included High Pressure boilers, turbine generators, pumps, vacuum systems, steam traps, and relief valves.

Dec 1999 – July, 2001 – Student - US Navy, Charleston, SC

Fermi2:
What exactly were your accomplishments:

Example:

Supervised 20 individuals of which 11 were promoted to leadership positions vs a Navy wide average of 6.


Yours is too generic.

Evals are NOT ways to sell yourself to an employer.

Rennhack:
Normally I would suggest you post you resume in the job board... you know.. that's whats its here for.

However, it seems that you are getting some very good resume advice that could benefit us all.

Perhaps we should all take a turn posting our, and letting the guys destroy it!  If the resume can survive THIS peer review, it is golden.

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