One atom in its old life was talking to another.
"When I was young, I felt so alive and dangerous! Would you believe I started life as U-238! Then one day I accidently ejected an alpha particle. Now look at me -- a spent old atom of lead-206. It seems that all my life since then has been decay, decay, decay..."
One atom to another- "I think I just lost an electron!"
The other atom says "Are you sure?"
First atom says- "Yeah, I'm positive!"
why did the atoms cross the road?
because it wuz time to split.