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Scourn99

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Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« on: Nov 01, 2009, 10:11 »
Hello, first id like to say this site is really great for info and its good to read peoples stories/ ups and downs so I can get a feel of what its going to be like.

My Fiancee is in Bootcamp and will be going to the Nuke School in SC in about a month. We love eachother more then words can express and want to get a Paper marriage for now and a cermony later.

She was told that since shes a E3 and not a E4, she has to put in a Marriage chit in and take Marriage classes at her A school before she can marry. (So there went the idea of getting married on her extended liberty since she grads the day before thanksgiving)

1.We are wondering how long the classes might be? Since she is going to get a good ammount of leave for Xmass, thats when we belive would be a good time to do it.

2. I plan to move down there (her father is going to pay the moving costs so thats taken care of). I have read alot about the housing but everything I read seems to contradict the thing ive read before it. Simply wondering, can she live in an apartment with me and just commute to her Nuke school there in SC?

3. If we can get married on/by Xmass, will we have the option to move to a on base housing?


We know its going to be hard, but we have talked alot about it and are fully ready to accept the facts. I accept and she knows im more then willing to do all I can for her to be successful and make marriage work. Infact before we started dating I knew she was joining the Navy and almost a year later were ready to get married. Thanks all who have any kind of information on my three questions.

Offline deelpickle

Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #1 on: Nov 02, 2009, 01:58 »
I'm not really sure on a couple of your questions, but I would advise, if this class is as hard as it's supposed to be for the Navy Nukes, you might want to wait until she is finished before putting the added stress of being a newlywed on her plate for the time being. If you both love each other as you say you do, you can surely wait a few more months.

As far as base housing. Unless it's a permanent duty station, I don't think you qualify for the housing. Somebody in the navy might be able to answer this better than I can, since I was in the army, but that's the way it was there. Also, with the economy being the way it is right now, the base housing will probably be pretty much full, since you don't have to pay for all the stuff on the economy at an apartment or rental house, such as electricity, etc.

I'm not trying to discourage you, but you might want to really weigh your options before you jump right in. Another thought for you, have you thought about what you will do while she is in school? Are you going to college down there, looking for a job, etc? An E-3's pay is not that much and heaven forbid if a pregnancy got involved. I knew many E-4 and E-5's that could barely make ends meet with a mortgage or rent payment and car payments.

Stacey

Offline Creeker

Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #2 on: Nov 02, 2009, 02:21 »
When I was staff there back a bit, students did live in base housing... You can do your entire pipeline there, so it makes sense to get into housing. And, unless it's really gone downhill, it was pretty nice housing.  Adequate exchange and commissary, as well.

Base Housing depends solely upon who's coming, and who's going.  Why not call the Goose Creek housing office, and ask if there is a waiting period.  That's certainly not restricted information...    And will help in your decision process. 

Length of classes depends upon her rate.  ET's will be in school almost 2 years.  MM's will be shorter... around 1.5 years.  I would recommend that you do live in housing if you can, but if you can't, they will certainly allow her to live out on the town.  Just remember... The curriculum, start to finish, is classified.  All of her studying must be done at the school, and you won't be allowed in there. 

Best of luck to both of you,

Bill

Offline matthew7899

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #3 on: Nov 02, 2009, 08:11 »
"She was told that since shes a E3 and not a E4, she has to put in a Marriage chit in and take Marriage classes at her A school before she can marry. (So there went the idea of getting married on her extended liberty since she grads the day before thanksgiving)"

If she did put in a chit and it was denied, would you allow the Navy to tell you whether or not you can get married?

The Marriage chit's purpose is to inform the command that you intend on getting married and will get the ball rolling for the proper paperwork to get done (ie. housing request, BAS, etc.). 

If you do get married before she gets to SC, she will be eligible for base housing (I would NOT recommend getting an apartment off base...this will just cause problems in the long run).  If married, she will also be eligible for reimbursement to move "her" stuff to SC (and in reality, who knows what "her" stuff is :)...the only limit will be based on weight).

Think about this decision VERY carefully...the Nuke program is very time consuming, she will be working, or at least need to be working MANY hours (40hrs of lecture a week plus a min of ~15hrs of study).  I will not go into any more detail on this, due to the overwhelming amount of information on this topic already contained in the forums.

Samabby

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #4 on: Nov 02, 2009, 10:31 »
How old are you? 8)

Scourn99

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #5 on: Nov 02, 2009, 11:23 »
Im 22 and she is 20. I've spent weeks reading peoples stories and talking to the recruiters. I know that she will have tons of class time and study time, but I accept that and support her 100% and willing to do all I can for her

You said the chit is only to inform them. I was reading and some people said you can't get married on liberty after bootcamp? This is where im confused on. If she puts in the chit can we?
Would she get in any form of trouble if we did?

Samabby

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #6 on: Nov 02, 2009, 11:29 »
Sorry, you are both too young. Stay where you are and finish your education while she goes through the Pipeline. Curse me now and thank me later. Good luck, son. 8)

Offline KUrunner

Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #7 on: Nov 02, 2009, 09:07 »
Unless something has changed since May, there isn't a "marriage class" and like Matthew said, the chit is to inform the command and help get the paperwork started.  It's not something that is denied (at least I've never heard of anyone being denied.)  As far as getting married during liberty weekend...  well, I've never heard of that being approved.

Once you are married, you are eligible for housing whether it's before or after Christmas and there isn't a waiting list.  You are able to live off base if you want, but housing is definitely to get into than an apartment.  Personally, I'm in housing now and wish I had taken the time to find a house in town, but you might get lucky and make it into one of the new houses.  Plus, it can take over 30 mins to get onto base in the mornings.
The first rule of thermodynamics is you don't talk about thermodynamics.

Offline matthew7899

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #8 on: Nov 03, 2009, 08:11 »
You said the chit is only to inform them. I was reading and some people said you can't get married on liberty after bootcamp? This is where im confused on. If she puts in the chit can we?
Would she get in any form of trouble if we did?

Just keep in mind it's purpose...to ensure that junior sailors are making informed decisions/not being reckless/preparing necessary paperwork.  They might prefer that she doesn't get married on liberty, but ultimately it is up to her. 

If you are determined to get married, I would recommend waiting until after she reports to A school, she can route the chit there and get the necessary paperwork started...then you can get married during Christmas leave.  Keep in mind, there is a waiting period to get a marriage license...some states waive that time for military (you will want to check that out).

I got married while on A school Christmas leave...came back to school, filled out the paperwork, got a house and after I graduated A school (March), we had the ceremony and we both moved up to SC.  Planning it out that way made it a lot easier on both of us.

Matt

Scourn99

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #9 on: Nov 03, 2009, 04:59 »
Ahhhh ok. She made it sound like it was a requirement, cool that its not. Yea our plan would be on her xmass leave since it would be simpler to do that.

Thank you guys very much for your info

Offline cairnit

Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #10 on: Nov 03, 2009, 06:34 »
Not sure where you guys are or planning to get married but, in S.C. the only requirement was 24hr notification for a marriage liscense. (unless it has changed when I got married there). We called the marriage chapel in Dillon, S.C. the day before and was told to come in and get married the next day.

Scourn99

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #11 on: Nov 03, 2009, 10:38 »
Most likely it will be in PA. Since shell have about a week off of leave, shell want to come up here where our familys are, get married during then both head back. Rough plan at the moment as im waiting to hear her thoughts in the letters

Offline matthew7899

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #12 on: Nov 04, 2009, 07:16 »
Ahhhh ok. She made it sound like it was a requirement, cool that its not. Yea our plan would be on her xmass leave since it would be simpler to do that.

Thank you guys very much for your info

It has been a long time, but I almost want to say that it is written somewhere that E-3's are "required" to submit a request chit...whenever you guys plan on doing it, if you know in advance...have her submit the chit, so it doesn't completely surprise her chain of command.

Samabby

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #13 on: Nov 04, 2009, 08:53 »
" Most likely it will be in PA. Since shell have about a week off of leave, "

Are you under the impression that this leave will be after Great Lakes and before she reports to Goose Creek? Unless there has been a recent change, all newly minted potential Nukes go directly to GC within 2 days of their PIR @ GL.

Scourn99

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #14 on: Nov 04, 2009, 09:49 »
She will have 5 days after PIR since she grads day before thanksgiving which is nice. The week leave she could have taken after bootcamp but we decided she should use it for xmass so she is going to take it then and have that week off.

Offline Gamecock

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #15 on: Nov 04, 2009, 11:22 »
She will have 5 days after PIR since she grads day before thanksgiving which is nice. The week leave she could have taken after bootcamp but we decided she should use it for xmass so she is going to take it then and have that week off.

There is no guarantee that she will be able to get CHRISTMAS leave once she reports to NNPTC.  Don't assume anything. 
“If the thought police come... we will meet them at the door, respectfully, unflinchingly, willing to die... holding a copy of the sacred Scriptures in one hand and the US Constitution in the other."

Scourn99

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #16 on: Nov 04, 2009, 12:21 »
The school has a 2 week standdown if I remember reading that correctly? Even if she's not on leave for xmass itself they did say since she is choosing to take leave during that time instead of after bootcamp she will get it. So a week before during or after all is nice

Offline Gamecock

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #17 on: Nov 04, 2009, 12:49 »
The school has a 2 week standdown if I remember reading that correctly? Even if she's not on leave for xmass itself they did say since she is choosing to take leave during that time instead of after bootcamp she will get it. So a week before during or after all is nice

I don't really care to debate the point.  Note however, that she likely won't be in school yet.  So, she is likely to be doing odd jobs on site....some of those jobs would require her to be on site and preclude taking leave.

“If the thought police come... we will meet them at the door, respectfully, unflinchingly, willing to die... holding a copy of the sacred Scriptures in one hand and the US Constitution in the other."

Scourn99

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #18 on: Nov 04, 2009, 05:03 »
I got a paper in her letter today ttiled Important Information for NFAS Married Personnel. From how it is worked it looks like it was to her but im sure she sent it cause of some information it provides. Does this paper conferm she has put in the marriage request chit? Asking because I wont hear from her til next Weds and wondering if anyone else has gotten this before.


Offline Creeker

Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #19 on: Nov 04, 2009, 08:36 »
Probably not.  It's probably a generic information sheet that she was able to get a copy of in boot...  Sort of a "I'm not married yet, but soon will be.  Can I have one of those?"  They meet with a nuclear rep while in Boot to get input on rating desires, etc, and get a brief on what's upcoming.  I wouldn't read any thing into it as far as permissions given... But, read it for content as to what you're going to face while in Goose Creek.

Bill

Scourn99

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #20 on: Nov 04, 2009, 08:39 »
Ah ok, thank you :)

Samabby

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #21 on: Nov 05, 2009, 10:05 »
Scourn,

From my heart I will tell you that you have much to learn about entering the world of being a Navy spouse. Best bet is that half of your plan may work out. Your 20 year old girlfriend is a tiny spec in the food chain until she successfully swims through the program. Don't place extra & unneeded pressure on her with all this elaborate scheming.

Two years from now, you might get to marry a 22 year old fully qualified WOMAN. Please feel the love & respect for your good and honorable intentions in my opinion.  8)

Scourn99

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #22 on: Nov 05, 2009, 11:05 »
Yea. Im just askin her light questions just to get an idea and asking most of my questions conserns here. Just trying to get an idea of "this is how it works   " since the recruiters couldn't help. I know our plans are no consern to the navy but wanted to see how it works

cleonard19

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #23 on: Nov 15, 2009, 02:05 »
hmm...

1) She won't be allowed to operate a motor vehicle while not on leave for the first month. Keep that in mind.

2) All A schoolers are currently required to live in base housing if married. Many can and have successfully routed chits at the beginning of both power school and prototype to receive BAH and move off base. Staying on base tends to be better for your grades...

3) They're renovating all the base housing. Its all actually pretty nice on the inside. If you score one of the newly renovated ones, you won't find a better deal out in town.

4) Traffic here is a b!tch, especially around the times that NNPTC students need to be getting to work. Its also a whole lot easier to get masted for being late multiple times in A school than it is everywhere else. They tend to have less leniency towards those who aren't rated yet. Life gets a LITTLE easier when you get your crow.

5) I know of three people that got married on grad weekend at RTC. There was no issue with it. The only thing to keep in mind is that you're not gong to show up in Charleston with her the same day she does. She'll report, and go through indoc, and then they'll give her leave/travel time to come get you and your stuff. the time allotted is the time the navy calculates it should take you to make it round trip, plus 48 hours.

6) When my best friend showed up to NFAS from boot camp, they handed him a leave chit, showed him his rack, and said be back here on january 3rd. In that order. Another one of our friends showed up the next day, was shown his rack, and told to muster at the circle at 0700 monday morning. He got no laeve. Its mostly up to the luck of the draw.

7) More married people fail out of A school than single people. Less married people fail out from that point forward. Just my observation, speculate as you wish, but that was the trend in my class as well as the one in front of and behind us.

I'd read number 7 twice if I were you.
« Last Edit: Nov 15, 2009, 02:11 by cleonard19 »

cleonard19

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Re: Engaged- Paper Marriage/A School Qs
« Reply #24 on: Nov 15, 2009, 02:13 »
and.... don't provide to your wife while she's still underage. Many people seem to think that silly law no longer applies to them since they're married to someone of age. Quick way to find yourself or your spouse at the green table.

 


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