I am afraid to tell her when I am on a sub it will be worse... last I heard we can receive emails while we are out, but we cannot send anything for the obvious reasons.
For active duty, let me just get this right.
4-6 months out
2-3 weeks port
4-6 months out
repeat?
I wasn't too concerned about it for me, I am in it for the challenge. I just hope she has enough to do at home to keep her busy.
Her friend is married to a nuke MM1, she says its best to stay on base.
What would be best for her? What can my soon to be wife do while I'm out?
First, you're not guaranteed sub duty. Then, there are many different schedules and the one you highlight is the most desired and least available. The general thumbrule is that the harder your work, the higher your GPA, the more likely you'll get what you want from Millington, TN. Otherwise, the Navy Detailer will usually not care if you're married as a reason to give you orders to Kings Bay, GA.
Second, your schedule and your fiancee's understanding of it is very important...from what I've seen in failed marriages. What if you end up on a CVN deployed for 10 months? That is a good possibility...so, will she be there waiting for you on the pier when you return? If you're truly afraid of the truth, then I recommend you confront the situation now vice after you're married.
I think the best advice is for her to stay as busy as you'll be when deployed. Working in the beginning of your career will help you both financially and college should be in both of your immediate futures (after you're qualified). Finding ways to keep her "in the home" are going to make her more lonely, most likely. Getting out with positive friends and staying busy (constructively) while you're working is, I think the key to success. On/off base housing is a personal decision based on the housing available in the area of interest. Personally, I always enjoyed leaving the base at the end of the work day, vice driving across the base.
Starting a new marriage at a young age and beginning nuclear training is about as challenging as you can get. Only you and your fiancee know, and will find out what works and what doesn't. However, I highly recommend a LOT of open communication over the course of your Navy career. An unhappy fiancee/wife and a severely distracted husband (i.e., trying to make unhappy wife happy again) is an equation for a potentially disastrous career start.
