Ok, a few things:
- You're right, I was mistaken. The DEP contract is in fact, legally binding. And yes, it is very easy to get out of it. You just have to write a request for separation and it's almost always granted.
- I agree, as a leader, if you can't depend on people to follow through with what they say they will do, it's a nightmare.
- Should he have followed through? Absolutely. The bottom line is that he said he would, and then later changed his mind. This kind of behavior doesn't exactly engender good relationships with the Navy, his recruiters, or the Nukeworker.com forum members.
- Yes, he is a kid. He's still got a lot of growing up to do.
So why am I still arguing on his behalf? Because I'm too soft idealistic, I suppose.
The Navy (and indeed the military in general) has a way of giving you an inner strength. Actually it's probably more accurate to say that it has a way of forcing you to discover an inner strength that you may not have otherwise known. You are tested, again and again. The stress, strain, and hardship you experience physically, mentally, and emotionally will strip away all pretenses.
Everybody (and I mean everybody) will come to that moment where they hit a brick wall. For me, it happened during my first year onboard a fast-attack submarine while in the shipyards. I was at probably the lowest point in my naval career. For as long as I could remember, I was exhausted, depressed, and beaten down. I wanted to give up. The thought had crossed my mind. But I didn't give up. I persevered. Instead of throwing in the towel, I kept trudging through. Eventually, I emerged on the other side. And in that moment, I discovered something about myself that I never imagined possible.
I discovered my true character. I can thank the Navy for giving me that valuable intangible benefit.
Now, whenever I see these bright-eyed recruits with their NUB questions and their enthusiastic posts, I see myself. They haven't hit their brick walls yet, but they will. There's no way to know what's lurking inside each of us until we are faced with that adversity.
So tfryman made a mistake. Sh*t happens. In my opinion (and remember I'm a softie) there are enough extenuating circumstances surrounding this incident to warrant a second chance. Put him on probation, if you like. But don't throw away an otherwise promising young sailor because of this.
It's not too late to make this boy a man.
